A bit of colour on Newcastle

I was trying to persuade G. to watch the Chelsea-Manchester United game tonight. It is quite amazing how partisan he has become.

G. (eyes wide in expectancy, hands in the air, shouting): "Newcastle United!"
Me: "No, this one is Chelsea versus Manchester United."
G. (displeased) : "No, Newcastle"
Me: "Well, there are lots of teams in England..."
G. (furrowed, shouting): "No, NO! ONE!"
Me: "There are lots of teams and they all play each other and they get three points if they win. They add it all up and this game will decide the winner..."
G. (totally unconvinced): "Football is goalkeeper and ball [burble, burble, not sure I understood it] the goalkeeper touches it. And the 6 players kicking it. And score a goal. And Newcastle wins!" (Eyes again wide with conviction.)